Monday, July 21, 2008

my heart goes out to you..

I saw a heart. A broken and scarred heart. I was staring at the heart, watching it as it wandered aimlessly through the broken roads of Palestine. Someplace somewhere, a bomb exploded, and thousands of people were scurrying, holding onto their lives as they scrambled everywhere for safety. Booom, another one exploded, and again, history repeats itself. A tear rolled down its cheek, an unexplainable feeling took over me. The heart limped, it staggered in grief, as if trying to find a more greater meaning to life, but found nothing. Walking closer and closer to the edge of the broken road, its head bent, its posture weakened, walking slower and slower, it dawned onto me how many hearts there are out there who suffer such grief, such harsh calamity.

As it continued its journey, it passed a toddler, who was dressed in rags which hardly covered his young skin from the blazing sun. He was weak and fragile, his eyes tinted with sadness. This innocent soul, brought to this earth as a product of love, so innocent, so pure, yet so hurt. How can anyone do such a thing to such a beauty. To see it cry, to see it suffer. Men, always thinking about themselves, always squabbling for pleasure, and always overwhelmed with lust. Leaders, always so bold with promises, always so timid with fulfilling those promises.

The heart stopped at the foot of the child, bent over, and kissed his forehead. Another tear rolled down its scarred face as it stroked the childs hair. A gesture so beautiful that no words can explain. Through all the hardship, the sacrifice, it could still let out heartfelt emotions, to share alittle bit more of the love it believes so little about.

Booom, another bomb explodes, and the child is left to scurry on its own, not knowing what to do, and where to go. He cried out for his mother, but no one answered. As he ran for safety, it was as though he was immune to such evil. To such manslaughter. Booom, another bomb exploded, bringing the little boy back to His Creator. Such a short life, and all he ever witnessed was death and crime.

I heard a wail, and looked over. The heart was broken, a tiny fragment chipped off, resembling another moment of sadness. Each fragment, one saga. As I stared into its eyes, I could see a glimpse of its past, once so innocent, so pure, filled with nothing but love and emotion, pumping with a beat so alive and vibrant. But now, just so empty and alone.

How much men can strip off the happiness of another.

Palestine, a place we shall fight for, a place where our hearts will join as one, a place where we will regain our pride and honour. All the ruthless acts that go on over there that no one in our comfort zone could have imagined, has to end.

To all those who have sacrificed everything, to all the souls who's happiness have been robbed away, to all those who have learnt nothing but hardship, and to all those who are suffering,

my HEART goes out to you..

May you be guaranteed all the sweetness of Heaven. Ameeen.

Saturday, July 19, 2008

bloody murderous...

I have a confession to make. A bloody murderous one too. Sorry to all those ecological (?), environmetal-friendly peeps.

I wanna kill, bomb, snakes, crocodiles, and sharks. All of them. Every single one them. Not even an egg left out.

Living pieces of venemous flesh, they just make me scream with fear. How can any of those hideously brave ppl socialise with such venemous creatures with nothing but a pair of shorts and sleveless tops. Have they lost their minds?

I was watching National Geographic the other day and I dont know how, but I managed to sit through an entire 30 minutes of gruesome carnivorous live handling. It was sickening. The snakes were practically munching human flesh with the least bit affection.

It was just "OMG, ssssssssss, i see human flesh, gulp,mmmmmmm, im loving it!!".

How inconsiderate.

In that documentary, some free suicidal bloke who thought that there was nothing left of life for him, hunched on both knees and stuck his arm under a huge boulder. He screamed so loud, struggled a bit, and took out what was left of just and elbow. Thats right. No fingers, no forearm. Just like that. That snake must have been freaking huge.

Suddenly some other guy launched his face under the boulder, perhaps slightly excited, and screamed again, and this time Im guessing the snake's missus had abit of a mid day snack munching a part of his once crooked nose. The guy fainted, hit the boulder, and was rescued. Talk about insanity ppl!!

The next clip focused on a guy walking silently into a swamp, yeah, wat a suprise, with army shorts. He apparently saw a pair of eyes and just decided to die that very moment. With no weapons wat so ever, he kept on walking, and suddenly SPLASHHH!!! A red colour replaced the brown murky water, and we all know what happened. Not a single bone floated.

On the other documentary I watched, it was all about the sharks. Only this time, it had a twist. Human and Shark, which one will survive? Duhhh, isnt that too obvious.
So of course, we have a bunch of ppl who think they've had enough of their lives, or maybe body parts, that maybe giving charity in the form of raw, fresh flesh to sharks would be something appraisable. So in goes Human. Here comes Shark. There goes Human. Shark leaves full. And contented. Guiltless.

How can I ever live to know that my generation to come are in danger, and are at any moment capable of losing body parts to these monsterous creatures??(emo la katakan..)

So that was when I came up with the thought.

That as long as there is a Puteri Alia Adeeba in this world, there shall be no snakes, crocs, or sharks. Period.

im working on it.

I shall make them vanish from the face of this earth. I hate them.

Friday, July 11, 2008


"Please, help me, Im poor and I dont have any parents. Please, please, help me."

A young boy, around his twenties, rang the doorbell, and started crying for help. He was in tears, sobbing about how horrible his life was. Coincidentally, I was the one who went to the gate, and got to hear this whole sob story front seat.

I sympathised. The boy said he was from Kelantan, and that he had 7 younger siblings to take care of. He said that they had been through such tough times, that sometimes 3 days without eating was a norm.

I went in without hesitation, and took a RM10 note, and some cakes I made, and a bottle of ice tamarind juice I had just pressed earlier. I gave him, and the smile he had on his face was priceless. His eyes seemed sincere and grateful.

As he and I walked away from both sides of the gate, I heard a laugh, a cheeky laugh. I turned back around and went close to the gate. Apparently, there was another boy, wearing batik, pricey batik, sniggering and choking to bits. They had a tight high five, and I just wished it was a tight slap from me. How childish and stupid. Using sob stories to get money illegally. How selfish.

I called out, and both of them stopped dead at their tracks. The one with the batik slapped his friend and asked him to hurry, the guy I think was too shocked and didnt move.

"Who do u think u r? What kind of a person are u, using unfortunate people's stories, just so u can buy drugs or cigarettes? I dont care if Im blaming u for things u dont do, but u just fueled me up with such anger and hatred towards brainless idiots like u two. I can easily call up the cops who are guarding that house infront. You want me to do that? I can. Dont mess with me, u jerks!"

"Weyh, cepat la, ktorang lari, abis la wei, cepat la."

"Get back here u coward, uve done wrong, and uve been caught red handed, I dont know how much uve collected just by using these lies, but uve been caught, u get back here, and give me that money.Or else.."

The idiot came back and gave me the money,and ran off.

"Ud better not do such crap work again, or else..."

Such ruthless money taking jerks.

O Allah, please bring ur Hidayah to those who have forgotten you.

To them we owe alot...

I was in Times Square the other day, when I heard a mother and daughter screaming their heads off. Not caring about the amounts of eyes googling at them, they just continued shoving harsh remarks at each other. At the end of it, it seems as tho the daughter got angry because her mother would not let her go out to the movies with her boyfriend. That girl's got to be thick.

So when I went back , I was thinking about that fight, constantly trying to figure out why is it that us children, and parents, never seem to be on the same page.

So this is an analogy I came up with.

Father is at home, very stressed out at work, and hadnt had his dinner. He's wondering about how he's ever going to pay off his RM12,000 card debt and his RM20,000 house loan payment. His boss just gave him a scolding for not finishing his work on time, and he knows its because the last weekend was spent with his children, trying to make them happy.
Meanwhile, son comes into the room and says, "Dad, can I have an Ipod mp3? Everyone at school has it, and I feel so left out and embarassed.! I always have to face them and give them so many excuses as to why I dont have one yet. So Dad, I want an Ipod, a black one to be precise."

Dad turns red, and his bad mood goes full blast. He looks up and shouts, "Why is it that you need that useless gadget? Dont you have anything better to do than to please your friends? Havent you thought about me, how hard Ive been working to get u a nice home, and equipt u with food and education? What more do u want? I never had and was allowed an mp3, why should u??!"

Shocked, angry, you flop urself out of the room and mumble short, anger-filled words."Why is he acting so crazy, he doesnt understand me! He doesnt care about me! I wish I had (*my frend's*) dad as a father!!urghh!"

Many a time we feel angry and upset with our parents. But if we sit down and really think about why they do some of the dreadful things we just dont understand they do, we come to realise that parents have so many things to worry about, and no one's perfect, so then why do we expect our parents to be perfect? Of course, not one parent is the same as the other, but they do have their similar mood swings at times. We just have to understand, be grateful, and most of all, bear through all of it with patience. Say thank you to them always, for because of Allah and them, are we able to live and taste the blessings of Earth.

May Allah forgive and bless our parents always, and may He love them as much and even more as how they loved us when we were small. Ameen.

Love ur parents. To them we owe alot.

Love comes..

I was talking to someone the other day, and it ended up with this wierd confession she made.and also a very funny thought about love.

"U noe wat Alia, I think Im starting to feel a wee little bit desperate for that guy. He's so charming, full of charisma, caring, sweet and thoughtful. Something Ive always been looking for in a guy for so long.I want him!!"

"Wow, thats huge!!How long have you known him for?? He seems nice!!""

"Well, we met two months ago, but it feels like we've known each other for forever! Hes always asking about me, making sure im ok every minute, its too sweet!"

" Awww, so u think uve found that one person uve been telling me about this whole time? U think its him??"

"Well, I mean Im not so sure about him being the one, but I mean he could be, but o dang, it sucks. Its like I think I like him, but some part of me says Im just falling for him cos he's the only one who's treated me like this so far, and maybe Im just attracted to the idea of him. O no, its nonsense all of this. Im just blabbing."

"Thats tough huh. Yeah, maybe its true, sometimes we just get so indulged in something that looks beautiful, without even realising how dangerously hurt we can get. But u noe u dont have to make a decision, just let time play its role. Dwelling on it just makes us slaves to this feeling. If it is, then it is. There's no use torturing ourselves into thinking about it."

"Yeah, thats true I guess. But u noe, lately, Ive been fantasizing a lot. Especially about that guy, its ridiculous! I tried so many times to shut him off my system, but im incapable of doing so!it sucks!But u noe wat I think love is?"

"Go on, tell me."

" I think its love when u get up in the morning, feeling all so dizzy and nauseous, even breathing seems difficult, and everything around u seems to be in a haze. What do u think?"

"hahaha. i think that sounds like flu dear!"

"Alia! urghh"

shes in a dilemma. Poor her, May Allah help her thru the rough times.

Love comes. Its just a matter of time.

Its all in God's hand.

ps: may We stay strong thru all the emotional ups and downs of life, so we grow into much more mature individuals, who has only HIM in their hearts, and may we be amongst those who has HIS love at full, not amongst those who fight and cry to have Human's love at full. Ameeen.