nothing.

After months of absence, my return to this place brings no good news, unfortunately. I'm really sorry dear blogspot.

In life, I've always witnessed many being slandered and said bad words upon on websites, anonymous' playing their nasty silent games, but alhamdulillah never have i experienced such an experience. However, my expectations and good news ended 3 days ago when someone thought it was funny and cool to write something so absurd and unkind on Farhanah's blog. Thank you for your words, your thoughts and very message. Verily you have opened my eyes to reality, for that i thank you too, but you must know that words kill, and yours definitely did.

Please know that you came at the best of times, when I was the least stable, when I was just gathering my strength to overcome the stresses of life, when I was trying to get my real smile back. However, please know that whatever goes around, comes around. So on behalf of my friends, Id like to apologize for our wrongdoing, for the things we did that made you clearly mad and upset.

And to the people around me, I would like to apologize before hand if i get a tad bit emotional, its just that my sensitivity threshold is at its minumum, so please bear with me. hehe :)

and lastly, thank you to all those who have expressed their concern and love towards me. you truly are my knight in shining armour! May Allah bless all your efforts for trying to make me happy :)

Tell me the truth, what is it you want from me?

I shall sit back and watch silently as you secretly mess and screw my life around. I shall be nice to you, I shall treat you good, I shall be your friend. But just know that I know what you're doing here. Its ok, I believe that in life, whatever you give, you shall get back. So continue messing with me, continue playing with my heart, continue toying with my feelings, and continue acting like you're all great and mighty. Please, please continue. Because one day, maybe just one day, you will get back what you're doing to me from someone else, and we'll see how great and mighty you'll be then.

But please remember, in the end, your life will come to a stop, and your deeds will be questioned and answered to the All-Mighty. 

It is easy for me to leave you out of my life and move on. But I wont do that, cause as long as God gives His Servants ample of chances and forgives them, who am I to not forgive you and believe that maybe, just maybe, you might change.

 

hehe. ni post yg mungkin sedikit emo. mungkin la, tah2 tak emo langsung kan. tp ni sekadar nk menyahut cabaran kawan saya yang kata saya ni xreti nk emo or marah. adakah saya berjaya? haha. mungkin tidak. mesti klu nk emo kene lagi dasyat kan post ni YOU. haha. o well, i tried. practise makes perfect kan.

ps: tp klu la ada yg terasa ngn post ni, aiyoo xtau. cepat2la berenti bermain ngn hidup/ perasaan saya ye. sekian :)

cause its you that i care about.

 Turn up the music, let the rain pour.

take of your shoes, and run out the door.

dont' turn back cos you've come so far, if u cant hold back the tears, dont even try.

god made it rain, so that the rain would cover up ur cry.

you know whats in my heart. no explanations needed. just know that even if you're in camp shezar and im in manshiah, no distance will separate me from you, cause you will always be in my thoughts. 

 if you need strength, im here for you. 

if you need me, i'll be there for you. 

and whatever happens, we turn back to HIM. cause He knows better and He plans the best plans.

and everyday, 

and if we feel like there's something we need to let go, even if its hard, just let go cause

 

and whatever happens, just

cause everything that happens is part of HIS plan.

 nti masih igt tak slogan hidup kt time kat Jordan tu.

let go let flow

im here for you nissy elle.just like how ur always there for me.

luv, ally D xxxxx

we'll make it to the finish line.

Jay Jelitaz and Ika Macha.

 we need to take more pictures you two, especially with you looking all sweet and cantik macha. :)

Together we'll cross the finish line. Now is not the time to stop. Walk tall and start running. Whatever happens, my hands will always be crossed with yours. Whatever happens.

haa, ni korang dua, bukan alia ye. :P 

No one can go through this better than you. Never give up. The sky is yours. The competition is yours to win. 

Go guys. Dont you dare stop. The siren's gone off, we'll meet at the finish line.

ps : klu alia xsmpai kat finish line tu malu je. punyala beriya nk suruh korang smpai, last2 alia yg xsmpai. haha . tp xpe, klu kt jatuh on the way, we'll have each other to get us back up on our two feet kan. :)

Lesson learnt?

Lessons.

1) Never laugh excessively. Your laugh can sometimes hurt others.  Lesson learnt.

2) Let go and move on. Lesson learnt.

3) Be nice and smile. Lesson learnt.

4) Focus. Lesson trying to be learned.

5) Jangan malas. Tough lesson to be learned.

6) Cakap Assalamualaikum bila masuk taxi. Lesson learnt.

7) Sedekah setiap hari. My favourite lesson to be learnt.

8) Tengok poupi cukup makan ngan minum. Lesson being practised.

9) Pakai tudung elok-elok nnt Bella marah. Lesson susah gile nk kentut bila ada angin ni.

10) Love the house to University journey more everyday. Lesson still being learnt.

11) Forget that problem you're having. Please learn this lesson quick alia.

Facebook status.

Current Facebook status :

Allah menduga, tp disebalik setiap dugaan itu ada seribu hikmah. and sometimes we focus on the test so much that we're blinded by the other good things that come with that test.

 

why is it this status?

Because

1) I get a hold on-michael buble song from the two most important people in my life.

2) I get Anisah Ali who has a blog post like this *click* and who successfully made my eyes tear.

3) My hijau team wins ping pong, gets through to futsal quarterfinals. haha.

4) I get Nabila and her sweet loving *kakak*ly acts.

5) I get Fatin Nur Atiqah and her rub me back sessions.

6) I get love from Malaysia.

7) I get my umi come over even if for one day.

8) I get my baba and his calls.

9) I got to finish TLOA. wuhoo. 

10) I found a MC partner.

11) I dont have to do ANYTHING for this PBL.

12) I get to masak on Fridays now instead of Sundays.

13) I get my husband/wife on my side. :D

14) I brought gifts for the ahli panel dengan berjaya.

15) I have a *:kp, :k, and bak : )* who I know I can count on. :) 

Last but not least, I get Allah on my side, always, no matter what happens. How I know this? well, because I actually have so much more than just these 15 things that make me smile and be grateful for besides that one thing thats bringing me down. :)

in the end, for everything that happens in life,

Allah knows best.

hijau dan bowling.

i read this blog . sila klik. and honestly shida, you mmg kentut. kamu mmg hebat, no matter what happened. that i know. competing is not mainly about winning, its about enjoying having people around you, knowing that there's always supporters, knowing that whatever you feel, your teammates will feel. That's the beauty of sports. Winning is obviously a sweet bonus, tp in the end the adrenaline and endorphins released are mainly so that we feel the fun, the excitement, and the ecstacy of that sport.

Kamu dah buat yang terbaik la. Serious. nk tgk alia bowl? mmg sumpah kamu gelak berguling2 masuk the bowling alley, and then i would have gotten a strike because of you.

Saya kagum dgn org2 yang pandai bowling, sbb tgk mcm ada style je nk baling bola tu, nk baling pun ada gaya, klu alia baling mmg gelabah la. ke mane tah bola tu. skali skala je dpt jatuhkan pin.tu pun maybe satu pin. klu dpt strike mmg patut buat kenduri syukur. 

You dont have to prove to anyone, I know you're superb at bowling at heart.wakil skolah kan! Cuma semalam shida kene main lambat kan, dh penat, and then dh la pressure tgk team2 sbelum tu main, pastu nk kene main 3 games. mmg letih. saya tgk pun letih, tp biasalah saya, klu tak over tu bkn puteri alia kan. haha. 

Soo, the conclusion is. hijau mmg rock, menang atau kalah, cos in the end we know we've got each other kan?

meh sini meh, group hug. :)

cikgu-cikgu.

E
verytime a new lecturer enters the hall, a new experience begins. Nk tgk gaya cikgu ni mcm mane, garang ke? Comel ke? Bes ke?

So as far as sem 2 has gone, I am going to make some summaries.

Cikgu biochem :  when I hear her voice it reminds me of the narrators in the old classic Disney movies, or the red fairy in Sleeping beauty. Wow bes. I am a Disney fan at heart, so I like her voice. The biochem?, ummm not so much.

Antara alia aten ngan bella, we always pray that biochem is the first lecture, xdela menyeksakan sgt nnt. Klu last mmg toooot, semangat dh xde, dok bayang cite Disney je la, klu tak dpt nk bayang, biasanye ten tido je. Kan ten? Hahaha.

Pastu tiba-tiba Fatin Nur Atiqah kata, eh cikgu ni pregnaaaannt!! And then ktorg pun spend the next half hour looking and judging her belly. Aten and Alia’s  conclusion is *yes, she’s pregnant*, Bella disagrees. What do you think? Haha

Cikgu Pharma : Setiap ari tukar cikgu, so xbrape nk kenal. Tp the first cikgu was comel, the second was so cool, mcm hebat computer je, dia tak pegang mike, tak pegang ape2, tapi tiba2 slide tu bleh tukar. Alia ngan bella mmg amazed. The 3^rd cikgu, mula2 garang, pastu mcm kelakar plk. That’s why we should never judge a book by its cover.

Cikgu Physio : Wooweeeee. Go go go go go go!!!! We like!

Cikgu Patho : cikgu ni baik. She looks like a good wife. Im going to look up to her when I become a wife.

Skills : nape eh section 3 slalu cikgu2 skills diorg mcm so attentive? Mcm cikgu skills last sem, alia pandang aten skit je, baru toleh SIKIT je dia dh kata “what did you say to her, what are you doing? Do you want to say something?”. Ada org tertutup mata longer than a blink cikgu kata “ do you want to wash your face?”

 So in the end, us girls, not sure about the boys, smua pun duk tegak, mata pun bulat cantik je, tak toleh mane dah. Straight, forward, focus!! 

tak aci. ke aci? maybe Allah wants this section to excel in Skills more than the other sections. yeah, i think thats it, jgn jeles please :)

despite the occasional moodswings or strictness. every teacher is superb in their own way. because in the end what they ever do is make us better more knowledgable individuals.

kekuatan.

Bad news are hard to accept. Obviously. Especially when its unexpected. My heart fell to the ground, my knees went weak, my eyes started swelling up with tears. Honestly this is Allah testing me to I think maximum.

Kalau bgtau anisah mesti dia kata, nti kene kuat alia, nti xle jatuh. And honestly nisa, even if u don’t know what it is, ana tau nti akan ckp mcm tu, and ana tgh cuba sekuat mungkin tuk go through this.

 Im going to come out of this strong. Allah is all I have and will have for now.

And no anisah, ana xle bgtau nti. It is too horrible to share.

Please stay strong alia. Seriously please do. For those you love, please do. Thank you. And just keep smiling while you can. :)

Stop being an ass and start becoming a friend for Gods sake.

I may not be the world’s greatest friend, but the world has certainly taught me a thing or two about how to be a friend.

Firstly, the world is not yours, you share it with other people, so stop acting like you own it and want everything to go your way. And kalau things don’t go your way, stop complaining, stop whining, accept it like a man and deal with it. But jgn la deal with it smpai everyone around you pun affected , deal diam2 sudah la.

Second, when you have a friend, treasure her/him, even if it seems like making friends is an easy thing, each individual you meet and will meet in your life will bring something different for you to learn  in your life.

Third, if your’e angry with someone, tolong la jangan tunjuk. Please. This is not something mature to do. Come on, we’re already 20 or nearing 20, act like a grown up, don’t be childish. Dah, your childish days are over, its time to get real and face reality. Nk ejek org yg dh 20 tahun tu dh tua takpe, tp sedar2 la diri tu pun nk 20 dh ye.  

Fourth,  Live by the golden rule. Always treat a friend as you would want to be treated. Don't do or say anything that you wouldn't want done to you. Be there through thick and thin. Ni bila senang dia je la ada kat sebelah, bila susah, haaa batang hidung pun tak nmpak. Jgn la mcm tu kawan, tak bes la.

Fifth, I know that no one is perfect and no one can be all nice and comel at all times, but please apologize and forgive and don't hold a grudge. Pastu kan, bila dh apologize tu, jgn la buat hal balik after 30 mins. Its not funny. Lama2 nnt org tak accept your apology padan muka. Mmg senang nak kata sorry, but please mean it when you say it. 

Sixth, don’t be selfish la sayang, tolong, ni perangai buruk. Stop it.

Seventh,  jangan sombong. Bila kt igt tudung kt cantik, ada org lain pakai tudung lg cantik, sama la dgn manusia, bila kt igt kt hebat, ada yg lagi hebat.

Eighth, klu dh moody tu, jgn la biar org lain pun moody ye. Paham2 je la orang lain pun ada masalah sendiri, takyah nk tolong tambahkan.

Ninth, try your best to not hurt anyone. Even if it seems impossible, just trying will inshaAllah avoid you from hurting at least 3-4 of the 10 ppl you might hurt when you don’t try.

Tenth,  jgn jadi a hypocrite. For Allah’s sake jangan.  Jangan nk buat baik depan org lain, pastu bila org lain dh takde jd kentut balik.

Eleventh, bila dh pasang niat nk mencari kawan tu, jgn la cari musuh ye.

Twelfth, bila marah kat org tu, jangan tunjuk pastu tak terangkan nape awak mrh, kesian la kat kawan tu, abis dia berpikir siang malam dia buat salah ape.

Adakah alia azlan marah? Mungkin.

Ni nasihat tuk alia azlan jgk ke? Ye.

Anda terasa? Sorry la yang, jgn la marah, kt kan kawan.

Kawan kan kene saling mengingati. xxx

Thirteenth, bila Almas Alias kasi kt hadiah, kata la terima kasih. Soo, Almas, thank you for the beautiful bantal. I love it. Just like how I love you. Kau la sahabat, kau la suami, kau la isteri. 

  

Fourteenth, bila hari ni 14/3, bila hari ni birthday housemate saya, Siti Nabila Binti Sheikh Yahya, wish la dia. Haha

Happy birthday Bella. I love you till death do us apart. Bila kamu menangis, saya menangis *mcm td* haha, bila kamu mengantuk dlm kelas, saya pun mengantuk.